How To Be Lazy: From One Lazy Person To Another

---

Let’s face it, everyone has experienced a time in their lives where they have told themselves that they’re going to go home, and do the work they need to do. But instead, from the moment they walk through the door and put on their favourite pair of sweatpants, they can’t seem to stop pressing the “next episode” button on Netflix. That has been me in multiple instances for the majority of my life. However, I have decided to be productive and yet ironic in this personal voice column and write about how to be lazy if you aren’t already.

In order to be lazy, one must be able to procrastinate. For example, if your mom asks you to empty out the dishwasher, shrug and mutter the words “in a bit.” Although you might get in trouble when hours have passed and there are still crusty lasagna plates in the sink, it’ll all be worth it because you can keep binge watching YouTube videos without interruption for hours on end. When you are assigned an essay on a Monday and it’s due on Friday, start on Thursday evening at around 11:00pm, because not only will you succeed in not getting a sufficient amount of sleep, but you will also work better under pressure.

There is also laziness that goes hand in hand with being out of shape. I for one, fall right into that category. I always tell myself that I’m going to try to workout while watching TV, but I always get distracted by the coziness of my bed that is covered in warm blankets and throw pillows. Once, I was at the mall and it was so packed on the escalator but I couldn’t bare to walk up the stairs next to it because walking around the mall was already my cardio workout for the year.

My point in all of this is to be lazy. Embrace being lazy. Take advantage of the fact that you don’t have to do anything except sit in your bed and read or entertain yourself with the abundance of movies and shows on the internet because you won’t be able to be lazy forever. Especially when life catches up to you and you can’t catch a break because you are so busy with work, family, and possibly a relationship. Here’s to lazy people everywhere from a fellow lazy person!

---